How does a dying man find peace
This is what the dying say shortly before they die
We live like this, annoyed by little things, ignoring the innumerable wonders of everyday life and suppressing our own mortality. Sure, who likes to think about death all the time? Like nothing else, he can show us with all clarity what is important in life. And already now, not just at the end.
Death as a life helper
The Californian photographer Andrew George has death as the subject of his project Right Before I Die made and portrayed dying men and women. “The photos show my admiration for those who look approaching death in the eye and do so with acceptance and in peace,” he writes on his website.Also on ze.tt
What the thought of death means to my life
George photographed the dying a few years ago in a Los Angeles hospice. But her moving words are timeless and go straight to the heart. They show how differently people deal with death, what different values have shaped their lives and who or what caused them grief or consolation on the last journey.
This is what the dying say before they die
“I'm not afraid of dying, but I'm afraid of what I have to do to stay alive. Sometimes dying is easier (...) I don't want to be a burden on my children. They should live their lives, not have to take care of me (...) My mother and my children will remember me for the fact that other people are so important to me. And I show that very strongly because I think you should. I don't think something like this should be withheld because we don't know how long we've been here and if you love someone you should say so. They don't have to love you back, but if you love someone they should know because you never know. You could walk through that door and that's it (...) First you have to learn to love yourself, only then can you really love others (...) Don't worry so much, because worrying brings nothing but stress, it does not change anything (...) There is so much to enjoy here and nobody enjoys it (...) I feel like I have no soul any more. As if my soul and my lust for life were leaving me. I don't want that, I want to be happy, free, loving - no worries, no sorrow ... I want to stand on the top of a big mountain and scream and then dive into a lake and be free of everything. "
“What I learned in the five years of my illness is that God was always with me. My son's love gave me the strength to keep going. And the love of God. I want to keep going until God wants me to ... thank you. "
“My wife wasn't my great love. That was a Japanese girl back in the 1940s. We got along well. She was fun to spend time with. She enjoyed everything, fishing on the beach, walking in the woods. That was when we were 17 and 16. But then, during the war, they put all the Japanese in camps. We wanted to get married, but the government said no because we weren't of legal age, even though it would have been okay with her parents and mine didn't even know about it ... So we didn't get married and the next time I saw her she was in Utah was relocated (...) I would have followed her to Utah, but I couldn't get enough stamp cards for gasoline (...) I'm not very happy with the way things are, but after almost 85 years ... why not say it's almost over ? I've had a few good times and a few bad times, but I'm not complaining. Goodbye for now. "
“Life is the waiting room for death. We are only passing through because you know from birth that you will die (...) I feel calm, relaxed, because I know that I will be leaving soon. So I say to God every evening: 'You already know what you are doing. ‘I am not afraid to die, I have lived many beautiful years."
"When I think of death, it is the beginning of a new, pain-free life for me."
“Today is Wednesday, September 25th, 2012. I'm in the hospital. Today is the day I go home. I was actually hoping that I wouldn't have to. I still don't feel that good. That means more work for my girl. But the doctor said I had to go home and I feel so helpless. Unable to help myself. All I can do is ask God to help her so that I don't do too much work at home. God is always with us. I hope I don't have to go to the hospital for a long time. "Also on ze.tt
What we can learn from death
“I lived at home with my mom and dad until I was 35. I worked for Lockheed Aircraft for 39 years. I met my wife in 1974, we got married in 1975. We were married for 35 years. She died of diabetes in February 2010 (...) I enjoyed my life. My favorite memories include how my brothers and I played baseball as kids and my mother participated. Later, when we were into off-road motorcycles, my mother got one too and took part. One of the happiest moments of my life? At the top of the list is the moment I married Sally. I worked her for a year to marry me. I knew the moment I first saw her, but she didn't feel the same way to me. It took a year to convince her (…) One day she said yes and that was a really nice day (…) When the priest asked if I want to, I shouted out loud 'I WANT!' (…) Love is something deep in your heart that you can really feel. It is a very, very good feeling and really nice when you know that someone loves you too. Difficult to describe. Love is a great joy - there is nothing you can do about feeling it (...) Life is what you make of it here on earth and I have not always made the best of it, but often I have. "
“When I got the diagnosis, my world collapsed. The first thing that came to mind was my husband and children. I knew I was scared, but they would have to suffer a lot (...) Time? I like to spend every minute of the day in the best possible way, that means time for me (...) I love to open my eyes in the morning and hear all the birds singing outside my window - that's the meaning of life for me - and them To feel the sun on my skin (...) At this moment in my life I feel blessed with all the wonderful people who are with me on this journey. New friends, old friends and relatives who you normally only see on holidays and who are now with me at any time of the day or night when I feel like I need a hand to hold. To have my beloved husband Raymond by my side, good times and bad. All the patience he had during this difficult journey. My beautiful boys, Alfonso, 18 years old and Alexander, 17 years old, who are still teenagers. This situation - it must be very difficult for both of you. But they're still doing well in school and trying to lead normal lives like their friends. I am also very grateful for my mother, she was there for me the whole time, and I want her to know how much I love her and how grateful I am for her help (...) I thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I will always love you. And of course a special thank you to God who gave me all of this (...) I'm hopeful because I haven't given up. My faith is deep and I know whatever happens: God will decide when I will go, not my doctors. "Also on ze.tt
How pain makes us who we are
“I feel like the luckiest man in the world. I have a wonderful wife, wonderful son and daughter, great grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Nobody could ask for more than that. "
“If that's not luck! I woke up, opened my eyes and took a deep breath. I'm alive. I am happy, healthy, loved, satisfied, and grateful. I think you are what you think you are. I am wonderful I am blessed. I'm here. I have the best husband in the world. I have two children, Nanette and Aaron. I have six grandchildren. I have a daughter-in-law and a son-in-law. What else could I ask for? I have life. "Also on ze.tt
Living with death: why it makes sense to face your own mortality
“I want to wallow in the why-me, but I also want to arrive on the other side as a winner. Why do I feel so unprepared? (...) I believe the door will open; we will return when we have completed the task for which we were sent here. "
“I've served God for 40 years (…) I've always said God is saving the best for the end - the hospital has been a blessing to me and my family. I thank God for all the doctors, nurses, staff, cleaners - each of them made our stay here a little piece of heaven. My family is now ready to let me go home, I will see my God Christ soon. God bless everyone who shares this message. I had to come here to be ready. God bless you."
“After my diagnosis, I stopped taking medication - I just wanted to die. I cried every day and didn't want to do anything anymore. I gave all my things away (...) Then at some point I said, 'Okay, I can sing and I can teach.' Those are the only things I'm really good at, so I signed up at the senior center and did for the older ones sung. I chose it because people die there and lose hope. One day I realized that I make people happy and that I become happy myself. That day I started to live (…) I don't know how much time I have left - maybe today? Maybe tomorrow is my last day. But I'm actually very happy and I have no regrets, even though I went through hell. As far as I know, I achieved what I wanted to achieve in my life (...) I am in a phase of my life where it seems that everything will be fine. I am so happy and satisfied and I believe tomorrow is ahead of me. There is a light that shines over my head and tells me that I am beautiful and radiant and that I have things to do and everything will finally be fine and tomorrow is just the beginning for me. Hurray for life! "
"I'm not afraid. I feel peace because I've done everything I wanted to do and tried to be the best person possible. (…) I am okay. My dear son, here I am at 84 and wondering what I'll do in a year if I'm still here. My life has been good in some ways and not quite so good in others. My beliefs, my love for others, my children and my friends have kept me going. I was the best mother I could be. My parents were wonderful. I was so blessed. "
“I don't know how much time I have left because I'm not the type of person who likes to think that way. I am stubborn; I'll fight to the bitter end Whatever happens, there will be another option. Maybe we haven't exhausted all options yet? Maybe we can try something new? I don't mind being experimented with, but I do mind giving up (…) I can't really think about what's fair - fair doesn't make sense. Things are not fair or unfair, life is just like that (...) Life is definitely not infinite. You never know what's going to happen and you really have to take risks from time to time. I only started doing this in my late twenties and I feel like I missed something. I missed relationships. At university, when people find love or have dramatic affairs - I've never had that. So, I had a boyfriend for a while and I liked him a lot. That was the first time that I was really, really comfortable with someone. After graduation, my mom sent me on a backpack tour of Europe. He wanted to get back together with me afterwards, but I was too scared, I didn't know what to do (...) I found him again on Facebook, but he's married and I didn't want to disturb his life. 'Hi… by the way, I have cancer.' It's been 14 years since we had contact (…) He was a wonderful person, but I never gave it a chance. (...) Time is so precious. God, she is precious ... "
“It was a good life (…) It was a full life. I had two wonderful wives, Beth and Pauline, and nine wonderful children: Marsha, Linda, Theresa, Bruce, Donna, Jennifer, Bijan, Jim, and Kurt. We have nine great-grandchildren in this family. In order to live a good life, I tried to follow my mother's philosophy and also added a few things to her:
1. Wake up every morning and thank God for yesterday. Thank him for all that you've been given and ask his help for today. Also ask him to help you forget yesterday, it's over. Yesterday is a bygone day. Today is new.
2. Forget yesterday - live today.
3. Love everyone you meet, no matter who they are or what they do, try to love them and try to give them a feeling of love and acceptance.
4. Take responsibility for your actions and your words. It's important that you don't blame others for your mistakes. If you say something bad, do something bad, accept it. When you hurt someone, ask for forgiveness.
5. Be nice to people. Take them for who they are and not how you think they should be - whoever they are, that's how they are. Make them your friends if you can. And the more you strengthen your friendships, the happier you will be, I guarantee that.
If you follow all of my mother's words - by the way, her nickname was Nana - you will have a good life. Trust me it works! To everyone: Follow my mother's wisdom, it works! "
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