How effective is Imago Therapy

How Imago Couple Therapy Could Save Your Relationship!

The Imago Therapy

Your relationship just doesn't work anymore? Do you mess around all the time and just talk past each other? Then don't give up your love just yet, because we suspect there is only a communication problem behind it. How can you solve this problem? The answer is: Imago Therapy. We'll tell you what this couples therapy is all about and how you can use it to save your relationship!

Is there radio silence in your relationship? Or when you talk to each other, what you want to say does not reach the other person? If you are now thinking about leaving your significant other and giving being single a new chance, of course we can't stop you. But we can recommend a fairly simple and - according to experts - effective couples therapy. We are talking about the so-called Imago Therapy. This is a Communication modelthat was published in the 1970s by American psychologists Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt was developed.

What is Imago Therapy?

The basic idea of ​​Imago Therapy is that we don't choose our partners at random. Our partner choice is accordingly the result of all of our relationshipsthat we had up to this point, for example to our parents, friends, colleagues. According to Imago Therapy, we therefore act in relationships as we have learned in all of our previous relationships. Then when a conflict arises, two people with different subjective experiences clash. Imago Therapy then not only wants to resolve this conflict, but also to look at the problem in a larger context - the sum of all experiences made by both parties up to the time of the conflict.

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How does Imago Therapy work?

That sounded pretty theoretical and pretty complicated now. The Imago Therapy is very easy to implement. It applies to the couple five steps to go through. First of all, the two parties should agree Introduce each other as a wounded child, a symbol for all the experiences that the other person has had in their past. The second step is to the relationship can be made more romantic again, for example through compliments, gifts and gifts. Third, we work on communication by Disappointments and frustrations are clearly expressed as demands rather than reproaches. The fourth step is to Feelings of anger and anti-attitudes are released. In the fifth and last step, the Relationship can again be seen as a source of happiness, contentment and security.

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The three-tier Imago communication model

A three-stage communication model based on the pillars should help in the implementation of the above steps reflection, confirmation and empathy is based. In Imago Therapy, this model is called the conscious dialogue summarized. Accordingly, disputes are conducted according to a conscious pattern. One party first makes a complaint, for example: "I was very upset when you went out with your friends again instead of hanging out with me“. The recipient of the complaint now mirrors this complaint, so: "So you were offended that I was out with my friends instead of you". In the next step, the sender of the complaint receives the confirmation that he needs (Even if the recipient cannot understand the complaint at all, it is more about giving the sender the feeling of being understood). He then says, for example: "I can understand that you were offended, that I didn't spend time with you“.

What is the goal of Imago Therapy

And the goal? It's about, Establish empathy between the two parties. The partners should learn to empathize with each other. This is supposed to Compassion and empathy be strengthened as well as stimulating communication in the relationshipto create mutual understanding.

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